


Prussia's Nightmare

by mysteriousStarlight



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Teenagers, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Bad Friend Trio, Countries Using Human Names, Death to The feels, Gen, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Let Me Know If I Need To Tag More, Lots Of Sad, Multi, Sad, Spain has Anxiety, Suicide, Texting, Trans Character, Trans Female Character, Trans Italy, lots of texting, so much texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-30
Updated: 2016-06-30
Packaged: 2018-07-19 05:05:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7346266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mysteriousStarlight/pseuds/mysteriousStarlight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Trigger Warning:<br/>Suicide  (It's in the tags :/ )</p><p>I apologize if I missed any pronouns, the story was originally written with the Nyo! Bad Friends/Bad Touch Trio, so it was different.  If I missed one, let me know.</p>
    </blockquote>





	Prussia's Nightmare

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger Warning:  
> Suicide (It's in the tags :/ )
> 
> I apologize if I missed any pronouns, the story was originally written with the Nyo! Bad Friends/Bad Touch Trio, so it was different. If I missed one, let me know.

Gilbert chuckled, munching on his Orange Chicken. He was at the mall, with his friends, Antonio and Francis. They had all stopped at the food court for their respective meals, Chinese for him, A Hot Dog for Antonio, and a sandwich for Francis. They had just finished having a long, deep, well thought out conversation about whether or not Mermaids needed to use the restroom, and were now proceeding in telling each other the most horrible, mindbogglingly offensive jokes they could come up with on the spot.

Gilbert chewed with a thoughtful smirk, looking at Antonio as she spoke.

"So..." He began, his voice dry, and filled with an air of unease, "How many babies does it take to paint a house?"

They shrugged in unison.

"It depends on how hard you throw them~" He said. Antonio looked like he was going to throw up again, while Francis picked at his sandwich, looking uncomfortable.

"OK then..." Francis began, leading them away from the table, since they were all satiated. "Anywhere else you would like to go to?" Francis had been taking the lead for the most part, although he kept spacing out. He had been the one to plan this entire excursion, inviting Gilbert and Antonio with an impromptu Facebook message early that morning, just after 7:00, asking if they wanted to go to the mall with him. He had apparently had already cleared all this by parents. They had met up, and now he was spoiling them to no end, buying anything that they commented on liking, and he was planning on giving it to them en masse at the end of the day.

Antonio nodded, and they went off to another store, the pattern continuing.

Several stores, and many shopping bags, later, they exited the store, contented smiles on the faces of Gilbert and Antonio, and a knowing smirk on Francis' face. They walked to the point where Francis' father had arranged to pick them up. They drove back to Antonio's house first, in near silence. When they arrived,Francis suddenly hugged him whispering

"Goodbye, 'Tonio. " with a smile.

"...See ya later?" Antonio responded, thoroughly confused.

"Yeah! Of course ~" Francis responded, a large grin spread across his face. "Goodbye..."

They smiled, and Toni went inside. The same pattern happened to Gilbert, with awkwardly long-lasting hugs without an apparent reason.

Gilbert walked inside, watching them drive off, and stepped inside his house. It was oddly quiet. Ludwig was downstairs, reading a romance novel, and his father was at work. So, aside from the occasional muttered curse word from downstairs as whatever fictional character he was reading about did something unpleasant, which one could hardly hear from upstairs, it was silent. Gilbert decided to use the peace and quiet to be productive. He cleaned the house, organizing things in manner similar to a recording of a tornado played in reverse, with rapid movements that somehow left tidiness in their wake. He was uncomfortable, and he wasn't really sure why. There was just a steady and ceaseless unease about him. Perhaps this was what Antonio's anxiety felt like? He shivered. It would be horrible to have to live like that all the time... 

With thoughts of Toni, anxiety, and unease still in his mind, he decided to call Antonio and check up on him. Perhaps this was like that sort of empathy link thing that they talked about in the movies, where when someone you care deeply about was hurting, you knew it too. He went to his contacts list, preferring to call and get an instant response, instead of waiting for Toni to eventually text him back. 'Tonio picked up half-way through the first ring. 

" Hi Gilbert!" He said, his voice happy-sounding, but shaky. "What's up, mi amigo?"

"...Are you crying?" Gilbert asked, a worried tone to his voice. "Your voice is all shaky." 

"Mine is? Huh, so is yours." Toni said. It was obvious he was trying to control the way he sounded, as his pitch had gone up nearly an octave. "You alright?" 

"Yeah, I'm fine. I was trying to check up on you. It's stupid. Never mind..." He said, quickly backpedaling to avoid unnecessary discomfort on either side of the line. "So, why is your voice all shaky?"

"It's just anxiety... I just got worried. No real reason." He said, with a chuckle. 

"Well then. Sorry?" Gil said, unsure of how to react. He felt the same way at the moment. 

"Not your fault!" He said, chuckling more. The laughter was so unbearably nervous, that it sent shivers down Gil's spine. "Just, uh, let me call you back, ok?" He asked, "I have a weird feeling..."

"What's it about?" Gil asked, starting to be frightened again. 

"I think this might be about Francis..." Antonio said suddenly, his voice becoming certain, as if, now that he had put his thoughts into words, they were all the more real in his mind. Gilbert's feelings of unease gathered to a focused location. 

"Yeah, you call him... Let me know what you find out, alright?" He said, knowing that it wouldn't work if they both tried to call him at once. 

"Sure! Be back in a flash!" Antonio said, hanging up shortly afterwards. Gil continued in his cleaning rampage, unable to sit still for too long. It was just as he was finishing putting away the dishes that Toni sent him a message on the group Facebook chat. He had more than likely been hoping that Francis would see the message, and respond. 

(7:17) ChurrosAndSunshine: He didn't answer :( 

Gilbert chuckled at the nicknames that the three of them had created just a few days ago. 

(7:21) AlwaysASlut4Doritos: Damn it. :/

(7:21) ChurrosAndSunshine: I know... You wanna try his cell?

(7:22) AlwaysASlut4Doritos: Sure

He slid the Messenger chat head down to the bottom of the screen, watching as it disappeared, and opened up his contacts once more, going down to where Francis' cell phone number was listed, just above his house phone number, under the contact name 'LaVieEnRose, the same name used in the Facebook chat. He tapped the number once, first accidentally hitting email, then after closing the email, tapped it again, proceeding with the call. 

RING 

...

RING

...

RING

"Hey there! This is Francis!" came a cheery voice from the other end. 

"Oh, Phew, Thank G-"

"...And I'm sorry for not answering. Just leave a message, I'll get back to you as soon as I see it!" 

BEEP 

"God damn it." He muttered, "Call me the fuck back. Toni and I are all worried" He hung up, or rather, he mushed his thumb onto the phone, accidentally putting it on speaker, before angrily hanging it up, and throwing it on the couch. 

He messaged Tonio back, flopping on the couch

(7:41) AlwaysASlut4Doritos: No answer on his cell either

(7:44) ChurrosAndSunshine: Shit.

(7:44) ChurrosAndSunshine: I mean, shoot.

(7:45) ChurrosAndSunshine: Don't tell my mom I said that.

(7:46) AlwaysASlut4Doritos: I won't 

ChurrosAndSunshine has changed their screen name to 'Hooman'

(7:48) Hooman: There, I like this better, doesn't make my screen do weird things.

(7:49) AlwaysASlut4Doritos: Should mine be shorter?

(7:49) Hooman: Yes please.

AlwaysASlut4Doritos has changed their screen name to '2005 Pete Wentz'

2005 Pete Wentz has changed the chat colors

(7:52)2005 Pete Wentz: Is that better?

(7:54)Hooman: Not really, it's just as long, but you can keep it.

(7:54)2005 Pete Wentz: Ok

(7:56) Hooman: I'm going to get some dinner. 

(7:56) 2005 Pete Wentz: You haven't eaten?

(7:57) Hooman: No :(

(7:57) Hooman: Wasn't hungry :( 

(7:58) Hooman: Still not, really

(7:59) 2005 Pete Wentz: k

(8:01) 2005 Pete Wentz: Enjoy your food

He set down his phone, lying his head back on the couch, deciding to take a nap for a bit. He could go downstairs and lay on the bed, but Ludwig was down there, and it was probably better to stay up here.

He woke up a while later, to see the rest of his family had come home, and gone to bed. He would be upset about them not putting him to bed, but honestly, no one was going to be carrying anyone in this family. 

(8:46) Hooman: I'm back :D

(8:46) Hooman: Any news?

(9:13) Hooman: Did you go to bed?

(9:56) Hooman: Good night. :D -_- zzzz

He felt a bit bad about leaving him like that, but, oh well. 

(11:27) 2005 Pete Wentz: Shit, sorry

(11:35)2005 Pete Wentz: Good night

(11:43) 2005 Pete Wentz: Sweet Dreams

He went downstairs, and fell back to sleep less than an hour later. 

The next day came and went, with no word from Francis. It was around ten o'clock the morning after, when he ended up looking through the logs from when they had spoke earlier that morning.

(7:13) LaVieEnRose:Hey Guys! I have an idea! We should go to the mall today! Sound good to anyone?

(7:14)LaVieEnRose:Oh, I already cleared this by your parents, by the way

(7:19)ChurrosAndSunshine: Hey amigo.

(7:22) AlwaysASlut4Doritos: Whats up?

(7:23) AlwaysASlut4Doritos: Also, Way too early.

(7:25) ChurrosAndSunshine:You did?

(7:27)ChurrosAndSunshine:When?

(7:27) AlwaysASlutForDoritos:Sure

(7:28) LaVieEnRose:Yesterday

(7:30) ChurrosAndSunshine:Oh ok

(7:31) ChurrosAndSunshine:Sure

(7:33) AlwaysASlutForDoritos:You driving?

(7:34) LaVieEnRose:Duh

(7:35) AlwaysASlutForDoritos:O_o Should I be scard?

(7:35) AlwaysASlutForDoritos:*scared

(7:36) LaVieEnRose:*cough*fuckyoumonfrere*cough*

(7:37) ChurrosAndSunshine:I'm excited! You never driv

(7:37) ChurrosAndSunshine:*drive

Gil attempted to scroll down a bit further to see the messages just after that, where they planned the excursion, and ended up freezing the messenger program. It shut down, and, after restarting it he decided to not bother reading anymore, and instead ask Antonio if he had heard anything. Wait- New 6 new texts? One from Francis' Father? Well. Not new. Fairly old, actually.

(6:43) Franny's 'pere': Hello there, boys. This might be a bit upsetting to hear, but it appears that Francis has run away from his home, although it is possible he may have been abducted. If any of you know anything at all of where he might be, please let us know. I ask that you keep him in your prayers, and I hope that he will be found soon, and safe. 

(7:43) Rice Barr: Oh... That's horrible... I don't know... how about you try asking Gilbert or Antonio?

(8:12) Birdie: Oh god. So many prayers. 

(8:27) Angry Pasta Lover: ... Damn

(8:49) : 'MURICA: WAIT WHAT

(9:13) Hooman: Q_Q Damn. I don't know anything. Gil either. I hope he's ok.

He gaped. So... That's what the feelings had been about. That's why he was so nervous. That's why Antonio was too. That's why he wouldn't respond. Gilbert fell over on the couch, curled up on his side, sniveling. He made a call to Antonio. He needed to talk to someone right now. Dad wasn't home. Luddy would probably be an ass. 

"Hey Gil..." 'Tonio responded, his voice thick, and groggy sounding, even though he had probably been awake more than an hour. 

"Hey." He said curtly, not bothering to disguise the way his voice sounded. "So... Francis." 

Toni instantly started sobbing. "I don't know where he is... What if he is hurt?! What if he was kidnapped?! What if he's... dead..." Antonio began, his voice trailing off, scared to even say the word.

"He's not dead." Gil replied with an silent eye roll, "He probably just went off somewhere and forgot to tell people. You know how he does that when family is being homophobic, maybe he was just forgetful. Or somewhere else? Maybe that one Trans Cousin's house? Seems like somewhere he might want to go to feel safe."

"...Maybe?" He said, sounding slightly cheered. 

"Hey, don't worry. I'm sure he's fine."Gil said, unusually calm, just before he was hung up on. He wandered downstairs again. 

"Why're you crying?" Ludwig said, keeping his eyes mostly trained on his book.

"No reason." he said, his voice sounding hollow.

"Of course." He said with a smirk

"Yeah." Ludwig was right. There was a reason. He just didn't want to tell him.

"Why are you crying then?" He asked, closing his book, and looking him in the eyes. ...Oh fine!

"It's uh... Francis..." He started, avoiding his icy gaze. 

"What about him? Does he not want to kiss you?" He said, chuckling to himself, before returning to seriousness. "But, seriously, what's up?"

"He's gone missing." He began, pulling the hood of his jacket over most of his face.

"Oh." 

"Yeah." 

He walked away, in a sort of daze. Fine, then, be that way.

 

The next several days passed by, with ever growing worry. More nervousness, less hope, more late nights, less rest, more prayers, and more tears. 

It was four days later, when finally, news was received. He saw the notification from the bar on the top of his phone the moment it was received, and his heart sunk to the pit of his stomach.

(9:38) Franny's 'pere': I know it is late, and I am sorry, but I have just received an update on Francis, and I thought that you all needed to know. Please brace yourselves, this isn't easy fo-

That can't be good. It took him several minutes of internal debate, and a few prods from Ludwig, as he was equally curious at this point, before he opened it. As he began to read, he was made even more nervous by the numb, cold way that Arthur had written it. As if he hadn't fully processed what he was saying, and was merely passing it on, before allowing himself to feel anything.

(9:38) Franny's 'pere': I know it is late, and I am sorry, but I have just received an update on Francis, and I thought that you all needed to know. Please brace yourselves, this isn't easy for me to write, and it certainly will be hard to hear. Francis Bonnefoy has been found, dead. He was found in a tree near the school at around Six this morning. It appears to have been a suicide, by hanging. Please keep us in your prayers. The funeral is to be held on Tuesday at Eight pm. 

He hadn't even realized he had started crying until a loud shriek released itself from his throat. Oh god. No. No. No no no. NoNonononono. 

A call came in from Antonio, and Ludwig answered it, his own voice a monotone similar to the clinical way Arthur had been speaking earlier. 

"Ludwig Beilshmidt. Name?" He placed it on speaker phone, so that Gilbert, who was now laying, curled up in a ball on the floor, silently sobbing into his knees, could hear what was being said. Loud wails erupted from the phone, along with faint voices in the background that were trying to figure out what had happened. Neither one said anything, each dealing with it in their own way, with the subtle comfort of having someone who understood there. Gil was silent, and scared, he didn't move hardly at all, just let small sobs shake him, as tears streamed down his cheeks. While Antonio, on the other hand, was loud. He had begun hyperventilating, and was shrieking at the top of his lungs, as his mother attempted to console him. It didn't really work, aside from the fact that his breathing had slowed enough that he wasn't in danger of passing out. Ludwig stood there, almost robotic, before crouching down, and putting an arm around Gilbert's shoulder. 

That day, and most of the next passed in the same way, him barely moving, and almost never eating. Antonio been brought over a few hours after they had received the news, since his mother had been unable to console him. So, Antonio stayed there, being brought clothes and packed meals by his mother, who couldn't find a better way to deal with this. The days passed with both of them in the same fashion, one loud, one silent, both holding each other tightly, for fear that they would lose each other as well, were they to even let go for a moment. 

It was now the evening of the funeral, and, Gilbert took a shower for the first time in three days. He remembered Francis' words a month ago about how if he could choose what his funeral would be like he said he wanted 'Everyone to wear what made them happy.' But, as he dried off, and looked at his clothing, he just sighed, nothing would make him happy here. Not here. Not now. He pulled on some black slacks, and dress shirt, and a pair of shoes that wouldn't hurt his feet, and stepped out of the room, not bothering to comb, or even dry his hair. Antonio looked like he had been in a similar predicament. They stepped into Mr. Beilshmidt's van, without a word. He had tear marks down his cheeks, but a small smile on his face. A 'brave face', most people would call it. 

They arrived at the funeral not much later. Much earlier than Gil would have liked. He didn't want to be here. He had been to this cemetery several times in the past, and it hadn't really bothered him then. Now... he felt like he was going to throw up. 

The service was going to be closed-casket, since they were told the body was too horrific to be properly displayed. He was there before they were going to close the casket. He was conflicted. He wanted to see his friend one last time. To get a chance to say goodbye. But, he also didn't want to remember him like that... Whatever he looked like. He stepped in anyway, thinking about how he did say goodbye, technically, when they had been dropped off. 

...oh god... Had he been planning on committing suicide that whole time? That was why he had gotten them so many needless gifts. That was why he had held them for so long. 

Everything made sense. And it just made it hurt even more. 

He stepped inside, looking at Francis' Father, who was being ushered out of the room where the casket was being held, by Mr. Beilshmidt, who had gone in with Antonio a few moments earlier. Gil could hear shouting from the man, who was holding a piece of paper, hand-written on both sides of the paper in red ink, covered in little hearts over each 'i' or 'j'.

"It's all my fault!" The man screamed. Or rather, he attempted to. His voice had gone hoarse over the past several days. His voice dropped to almost a whisper "If I had known! If I had known why my unkind words upset him so much! I would have never said them... This is all my fault... I made him feel so... Worthless! ...What if I could have just kept my mouth shut? ...would he still be here?" Francis' father trailed off into more painful introspection. Gil walked away, unable to deal with listening to this any longer. He could still faintly hear it, as he walked to the room where Antonio, Mr. Beilshmidt, and the man had been a few moments ago. 

The body had not been taken care of at all. It lay there, bloody, and with a dark bruise in a perfect circle around the neck. He couldn't hold back more tears as he stared at the cold figure that was once his best friend. He looked closer, and seeing inside his jacket pocket was an envelope labelled 'to my friends and family'. Inside was a hand-written letter, addressed to each member of his family that Francis could still say he cared for, along with all of his good friends. 

Gilbert plucked his own letter from the envelope, and handed the rest of the envelope to a woman standing nearby, who had spaced out upon seeing the body. "... I-I believe there might be a letter for you in here..." He said, placing his own letter into his pocket, afraid to open it just yet. 

The woman sifted through the envelope, pulling out a letter labelled 'Felicia T.' and began reading it. She couldn't have gotten through three words of the letter before she folded it back up, placing it in her purse. "... I-I can't do this r-right now..." She said, her hands shaking. She stood up and removed a red necklace with three hearts on it, placing it in the pocket the letters had been found. "Keep it, big brother Francis ... I'm ... s-sorry I couldn't get to you in time..." She said, before leaving the funeral parlor, and sitting on the curb, her head in her hands, presumably waiting for someone to pick her up, since she was clearly in no condition for driving. 

Gilbert looked back at the coffin, as Francis father once again attempted to approach it, before the man promptly left, unable to be in the room for even that brief amount of time. He had more than likely been here for hours, just... hoping. Hoping that somehow, some way, he would be alive the next time he came to check on him. Each time he was still 'asleep' was just another shred of his hope, slowly slipping away. 

GIl placed a small kiss on Francis' forehead, and removed the half-heart friendship necklace from around his own neck, placing it in Francis' pocket next to the Red Necklace. His eyes appeared to have run out of tears to cry. 

"Well... I guess this is good bye..." He said, wiping away any stray tears, smiling slightly. A 'brave face'.

"Sweet Dreams, my friend."

 

 

 

 

 

 

Gilbert awoke with a start, at the beeping of his Cell phone. Oh god... It was... It was just a dream!? 

He started crying again, this time tears of happiness. 

He pulled out his phone, and gasped.

(7:13) LaVieEnRose:Hey Guys! I have an idea! We should go to the mall today! Sound good to anyone?

(7:14) LaVieEnRose:Oh, I already cleared this by your parents, by the way

**Author's Note:**

> I'm aware that I discussed making a sequel to this, and I regret to say that I physically can't. 
> 
> My characterization and ideas for all stories based around the BTT/BFT have been my two best friends and I. (One being Gil, the other, Toni, and Myself, Francis.) I have since lost them both, one (hopefully) temporarily, and the other, permanently. I can not physically write another story based on them, at the very least until the wound has healed. While I am glad that I wrote this one, and will keep it up, I can not get myself to make something new. 
> 
> Thank you for understanding.


End file.
